I'm so fucking fed up with modern reality and internet. (Overthinking)
So the time has finally arrived...
After 7 whole years of enrolling in college... with an animation major, a graphic design minor with a Bachelor's Degree in Art. This SHOULD be my year. The time I will be getting a job. I will improve my portfolio, work on my graphic designs, animation and show the world how great I am as an animator and a person.
If only it's that easy...
TLDR: I cannot stand modern social media and reality anymore. Ever since late 2025, I turned anti-social and my anxiety worsens after an incident in 2025.
I'M NOT DEFACING OR DISCRIMINATING ANYONE. JUST GETTING THIS HUGE ANXIETY OFF OF MY CHEST.
"Me posting on my various social medias and networks only did nothing but made me ponder.
Is it even worth it posting on other social media sites anymore...?
Am I just doing all this failed promotion for nothing...?
Is it even worth branching out to other social media indie or corporate...? Or are all efforts futile?
Is social media now all just ghost faving, politics, disappearing, follow the trendy thing and disappearing media I’ll never see again because said artist never reposted it anywhere…?
I rather disappear completely rather than make more accounts on the 100 million Deviantart alternatives."
I want to get this out for long while since late 2025. My oldest Wikia/FANDOM friend who I don’t talk much to anymore after he transitioned into a full blown transmac furry left DA for Unvale, a Toyhouse Clone not a DA clone, btw. I joined suite too only to forget about it because I don’t have many OCs to share or the kind to make any OCs hence why I never cared about Artfight. I was never interested in OCs or any OC making at all.
And then I continued posting here and all the other alternatives I already in including Artfol, Pillowfort and Animations on YouTube and Instagram. And advertised my Ko-fi as much as possible and considered getting a Patreon. But then as time goes on. I finally realize. The more I post on social media (indie or corporate), the more it felt pointless while posting anywhere else. This is why I never cared to post more on SheezyArt or Cara or like the other million art focused social media. Especially after the Buzzly Kerfuffle. I'm very anti-social.
And I felt really depressed even when just copy and pasting said description on each drawing. Like... it's not worth it anymore especially from someone who turned anti-social (outside of Discord, maybe but then even I find myself talking there less and less.)
Like everyone and their mother on this site, I considered leaving just because (look at the video I saved from Tumblr):
But this is my first social network here. Even Handshake and LinkedIn can’t make me leave.
This is not about me whining my art (especially my current ones) not getting attention. It is more like how the attention I got from the alternatives is no better than the attention I got here. Even out here the only thing that got real attention is one of my old fetish commission and my old WarioWare crap because kids just love Nintendo stuff...which I just wish to delete them all at this point.
I’m not much of a social person since I graduated university. I was more fixated on digital art and my animation. So, I don’t even have enough time to branch out. And I find myself interacting and posting less and less as I take care of other subject matters. I felt like I’m wasting time of these personal projects: Both Graphic design and Animation.
I would rather just sketch and draw on my sketchbook. I worked on my tablet until my arm goes to sleep and what? Only a few views after YouTube? Barely any comments? What would be the point? What happened to critics and criticism?
Every time I find drama related to here or other social media especially AI and war, my heart to start to break after reading the comments. I felt dying on the inside and the only thing I can just say is a farewell with a fake smile without getting blocked or a fatal argument.
This is my beef of LEAVING DEVIANTART POSTS. Not just leaving but deleting their account outright so no one can see their old works back in the golden days of the internet. Forever to be lost media unless the OG artist reuploaded it somehow? Why? I'm pretty sure they are already AI trained anyway so I don't even see that leaving DA/Twitter/etc is the best solution.
Or if the Pinterest gods smile upon me? It doesn’t work with underrated franchise artwork however. And the search engine there is so atrocious that keywords are useless. Artist names work... sometimes. Not to mention Archive sites... They rather save drama and useless thingies like political and AI stuff rather than artwork.
Every time I see a Cara link or hell an alt art site link, I got butterflies growing in my tummy. I’ll never know if someone disappears and some of the legacy art is gone forever without a warning. Hence why I was hoarding art from AquaWaters who left admist the DreamUp thingie.
Also, I now discovered thanks to the alterations DA made, the alternative "artsite" already exists.
Did the multimage upload and subscription pushing look familiar to you?
It's INSTAGRAM. And by extent Twitter/X. They are the reasons art orientated sites dimmish. Not Cara or whatever else. There are joining an indie social media for what? The most groundbreaking app in the history and then it was barely mentioned again.
I should go from here whenever Deviantart becomes the next Goanimate/Vyond and die like Amino Apps did. But at the same time, I don’t want to (until it dies of course but you get my point).
I’m not grieving on just Deviantart's poor reception thanks to Izzyzz or other YouTubers like Visual Venture as a result of the head comp's incompetence.I
have Aspergers and sheer anxiety not helping by the time of September
2025, my birthday month. I went through a second car accident out of my
plain stupidity and because of my prior car problems and my panic that I
can't keep a car alive and emergency services are called automatically
when I crashed. I went into fight and flight mode and was since
tranquilized with a medication, I'm allergic to. I was sent to the
mental hospital out against my will and got so paralyzed that
I cannot speak and barely able to breathe for the night. I almost died
that night. Even though I recovered the next day. I was still
traumatized and my view of the future diminish.
My anxiety grows larger. And worse after I graduated. I have an outstanding loan payment from the loans I borrowed. Although my parents paid for it, I remain trying and failing to get one job. Only to get what? Just ghosting. Lots of job scams with me even nearly falling for one. And interviews that went total silent afterwards. No luck at all because they had too many people somehow(?). My Ko-Fi and Commissions are only getting anything once in a blue moon no matter how much I advertise. Viewers just simply ignore them and see art and forget about it a millisecond later. When my parent dies eventually, I'll be living in the streets. My dad got eye surgery recently and my mom don't want me to suffer the same thing.
Is it even worth it posting on other social media sites anymore...?
Am I just doing all this failed promotion for nothing...?
Is it even worth branching out to other social media indie or corporate...? Or are all efforts futile?
Is social media now all just ghost faving, politics, disappearing, follow the trendy thing and disappearing media I’ll never see again because said artist never reposted it anywhere…?
I rather disappear completely rather than make more accounts on the 100 million Deviantart alternatives."
I want to get this out for long while since late 2025. My oldest Wikia/FANDOM friend who I don’t talk much to anymore after he transitioned into a full blown transmac furry left DA for Unvale, a Toyhouse Clone not a DA clone, btw. I joined suite too only to forget about it because I don’t have many OCs to share or the kind to make any OCs hence why I never cared about Artfight. I was never interested in OCs or any OC making at all.
And I felt really depressed even when just copy and pasting said description on each drawing. Like... it's not worth it anymore especially from someone who turned anti-social (outside of Discord, maybe but then even I find myself talking there less and less.)
Like everyone and their mother on this site, I considered leaving just because (look at the video I saved from Tumblr):
But this is my first social network here. Even Handshake and LinkedIn can’t make me leave.
This is not about me whining my art (especially my current ones) not getting attention. It is more like how the attention I got from the alternatives is no better than the attention I got here. Even out here the only thing that got real attention is one of my old fetish commission and my old WarioWare crap because kids just love Nintendo stuff...
I’m not much of a social person since I graduated university. I was more fixated on digital art and my animation. So, I don’t even have enough time to branch out. And I find myself interacting and posting less and less as I take care of other subject matters. I felt like I’m wasting time of these personal projects: Both Graphic design and Animation.
I would rather just sketch and draw on my sketchbook. I worked on my tablet until my arm goes to sleep and what? Only a few views after YouTube? Barely any comments? What would be the point? What happened to critics and criticism?
Every time I find drama related to here or other social media especially AI and war, my heart to start to break after reading the comments. I felt dying on the inside and the only thing I can just say is a farewell with a fake smile without getting blocked or a fatal argument.
This is my beef of LEAVING DEVIANTART POSTS. Not just leaving but deleting their account outright so no one can see their old works back in the golden days of the internet. Forever to be lost media unless the OG artist reuploaded it somehow? Why? I'm pretty sure they are already AI trained anyway so I don't even see that leaving DA/Twitter/etc is the best solution.
Or if the Pinterest gods smile upon me? It doesn’t work with underrated franchise artwork however. And the search engine there is so atrocious that keywords are useless. Artist names work... sometimes. Not to mention Archive sites... They rather save drama and useless thingies like political and AI stuff rather than artwork.
Every time I see a Cara link or hell an alt art site link, I got butterflies growing in my tummy. I’ll never know if someone disappears and some of the legacy art is gone forever without a warning. Hence why I was hoarding art from AquaWaters who left admist the DreamUp thingie.
Also, I now discovered thanks to the alterations DA made, the alternative "artsite" already exists.
It's INSTAGRAM. And by extent Twitter/X. They are the reasons art orientated sites dimmish. Not Cara or whatever else. There are joining an indie social media for what? The most groundbreaking app in the history and then it was barely mentioned again.
I should go from here whenever Deviantart becomes the next Goanimate/Vyond and die like Amino Apps did. But at the same time, I don’t want to (until it dies of course but you get my point).
I’m not grieving on just Deviantart's poor reception thanks to Izzyzz or other YouTubers like Visual Venture as a result of the head comp's incompetence.
I have Aspergers and sheer anxiety not helping by the time of September 2025, my birthday month. I went through a second car accident out of my plain stupidity and because of my prior car problems and my panic that I can't keep a car alive and emergency services are called automatically when I crashed. I went into fight and flight mode and was since tranquilized with a medication, I'm allergic to. I was sent to the mental hospital out against my will and got so paralyzed that I cannot speak and barely able to breathe for the night. I almost died that night. Even though I recovered the next day. I was still traumatized and my view of the future diminish.
My anxiety grows larger. And worse after I graduated. I have an outstanding loan payment from the loans I borrowed. Although my parents paid for it, I remain trying and failing to get one job. Only to get what? Just ghosting. Lots of job scams with me even nearly falling for one. And interviews that went total silent afterwards. No luck at all because they had too many people somehow(?). My Ko-Fi and Commissions are only getting anything once in a blue moon no matter how much I advertise. Viewers just simply ignore them and see art and forget about it a millisecond later. When my parent dies eventually, I'll be living in the streets. My dad got eye surgery recently and my mom don't want me to suffer the same thing.
Honestly, I think the only way for get DA to come back to normal the way everybody like it is... if it gets hacked or suffers a big data breach.
I know one data breach happened to Jumpstart leaking over 69 million worth of accounts. This caused Jumpstart (nostalgia) to die for real and Neopets to move under indie ownership and it went better afterwards.
Before COVID, I was a happy optimistic person. Looking forward to the future and show off my hard done work, showing my love for Crystal Story. My Youtube and galleries say so!
Now thanks to said traumatic event and internet's state with the modern internet being too focused on trends, politics, and the algorithm... I understand all the shit that's happening is very bad and serious right now especially genocide and war and the president. But at the same time, I'm getting sick of propaganda. They even manage to wriggle past within community which mainly have nothing to do with the plot. Take for example "Free Palestine and FUCK ICE" message under a admin's (dhelmise) prof pic on the Smogon Forums. For clarification: I am aware of the horrific event and I too am I appalled of the genocide that occurred. Heck, I used to reblog anti-AI posts on Tumblr and now a person (fellow Crystal Story fan) saw this negativity and blocked me because of it, I understand because she didn't want to see me turn political. And now political propaganda like the war stuff is now the main focus of the gimmick blogs and former friends I used to follow? I don't need to see any propaganda that isn't sheerly focused on it. I just want to browse and play games peacefully. I know you want to spread the word and I know the whole event is awful but I don't need to see on anything unrelated to it...
I really wish to return back to the simple times. Back in the old days. When times aren’t simple and aren’t money begging as they are now with way less poltics I mean.
Honestly, when DeviantArt, Twitter/X, Tumblr, BlueSky, and Instagram shut down in the super far future, I think I will be satisfied. Not having to deal with big social media and network while the indie ones like Newgrounds, Cara, SheezyArt and etc as more and more kept getting funded eventually become filled with toxic kids, adults and teens with new sane artist who need an "old DeviantArt" to replace Deviantart after an eventual #DropDeviantArt protest while I just look back, no longer having anymore social media accounts and watch the internet burn.
I know one data breach happened to Jumpstart leaking over 69 million worth of accounts. This caused Jumpstart (nostalgia) to die for real and Neopets to move under indie ownership and it went better afterwards.
Now thanks to said traumatic event and internet's state with the modern internet being too focused on trends, politics, and the algorithm... I understand all the shit that's happening is very bad and serious right now especially genocide and war and the president. But at the same time, I'm getting sick of propaganda. They even manage to wriggle past within community which mainly have nothing to do with the plot. Take for example "Free Palestine and FUCK ICE" message under a admin's (dhelmise) prof pic on the Smogon Forums. For clarification: I am aware of the horrific event and I too am I appalled of the genocide that occurred.
I really wish to return back to the simple times. Back in the old days. When times aren’t simple and aren’t money begging as they are now with way less poltics I mean.
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